Chew_12
Working
- Joined
- December 2, 2002
- Messages
- 2,114
- Reaction score
- 1
- City, State
- Chandler, AZ
- Year, Model & Trim Level
- '93 XLT
10. You have yet to turn off your computer for at least 3 months, lest someone miss your Pulitzer winning away messages, such as "What if the Hokey Pokey is REALLY what its all about?"
9. You have found that your standard of living has reduced significantly. Clothes formerly categorized as 'dirty' now require sub-categories like 'still smells like beer but okay to wear to class' or 'reeks like thrown-up sushi: gym-use only'.
8. Going to class at 11 is no longer 'awesome', as it appears from high school, but is rather very early, very annoying and recognizable by extensive complaints. "What are we, on a farm? Why the hell is it so early? Are there rustic outdoor chores to be done?" The crack of dawn has hence been pushed forward to 10 a.m.
7. You are now a NASA certified astronaut, having mastered the art of powdered/dried food preparation, sleep deprivation, and pissing in unique and unknown circumstances.
6. Your Brita filter is filled to the brim with Vlady's, as a result of last night's effort to filter the cheap vodka into a liquid less similar to chlorine.
5. Overheard bits of conversation around campus such as "...then I boiled it in a POT for like..." perk you up immediately.
4. You've made a small fortune in a quick, easy, and socially conscious manner... but have no plasma left to enjoy it.
3. The police no longer represent an authoritative entity dedicated to public service and safety, but are rather recognized in drunken hazes as "Its the f***in po!", "Arrest me pu**y", and "You f***in po!".
2. As a female, your main preocupation is breast amplification. As a male, your sole preocupation is capitalizing on said amplification.
1. Words like "major", "career", and "the real world" induce a primordial reaction, causing severe anxiety, distress, and self-doubt. Antidote found only in metal cans pagacked in half-dozen quantities.
From CollegeHumor
9. You have found that your standard of living has reduced significantly. Clothes formerly categorized as 'dirty' now require sub-categories like 'still smells like beer but okay to wear to class' or 'reeks like thrown-up sushi: gym-use only'.
8. Going to class at 11 is no longer 'awesome', as it appears from high school, but is rather very early, very annoying and recognizable by extensive complaints. "What are we, on a farm? Why the hell is it so early? Are there rustic outdoor chores to be done?" The crack of dawn has hence been pushed forward to 10 a.m.
7. You are now a NASA certified astronaut, having mastered the art of powdered/dried food preparation, sleep deprivation, and pissing in unique and unknown circumstances.
6. Your Brita filter is filled to the brim with Vlady's, as a result of last night's effort to filter the cheap vodka into a liquid less similar to chlorine.
5. Overheard bits of conversation around campus such as "...then I boiled it in a POT for like..." perk you up immediately.
4. You've made a small fortune in a quick, easy, and socially conscious manner... but have no plasma left to enjoy it.
3. The police no longer represent an authoritative entity dedicated to public service and safety, but are rather recognized in drunken hazes as "Its the f***in po!", "Arrest me pu**y", and "You f***in po!".
2. As a female, your main preocupation is breast amplification. As a male, your sole preocupation is capitalizing on said amplification.
1. Words like "major", "career", and "the real world" induce a primordial reaction, causing severe anxiety, distress, and self-doubt. Antidote found only in metal cans pagacked in half-dozen quantities.
From CollegeHumor
